Many things are a puzzle. Here are some of the small ones...
Why so some people say second guess when they just mean... guess?
Why do some people insist on describing things as simplistic when they mean simple?
Why do TV and radio arts pundits describe nearly everything they are reporting on as extraordinary?
Why do some people feel compelled to keep on blogging and twitterering their everyday niggles?
I only ask.
Tuesday 28 September 2010
Sunday 26 September 2010
Wild sort of thing
Re 'I Can't Control Myself':
Perhaps someone should commend the idea to John Shuttleworth. I think it might work very well for him on the keyboard. After the ‘I can’t control myself’ bit, he could perhaps add a really wild sort of flourish – something like the Osmonds did on Crazy Horses.
And of course his audience (no ageism intended here; I hope he wouldn't be offended) would be more likely to know what slacks were. It's possible, now one thinks about it, that younger audiences might be confused.
Perhaps someone should commend the idea to John Shuttleworth. I think it might work very well for him on the keyboard. After the ‘I can’t control myself’ bit, he could perhaps add a really wild sort of flourish – something like the Osmonds did on Crazy Horses.
And of course his audience (no ageism intended here; I hope he wouldn't be offended) would be more likely to know what slacks were. It's possible, now one thinks about it, that younger audiences might be confused.
Saturday 25 September 2010
Trouser it to me
Your slacks are low and your hips are showing….
The line comes from a Sixties smash by the Troggs, and it occurs to me (not for the first time) that there cannot be much time left for a revival. The title (I Can’t Control Myself) might attract negative comment in some quarters these days, but the resulting publicity would only help with promotion.
The vogue for low-slung comedy trousers has already lasted longer than anyone could have anticipated, and the window of opportunity must surely close soon.
Has no one in the world of popular music noticed this?
Where is Jonathan King when the world of pop needs him?
I can’t find Reg Presley on Twitter; if anyone knows where he is, please communicate the suggestion.
Let’s hope he remembers that the idea came from me and not from a UFO. He would be welcome to show his appreciation. Cash rarely offends.
The line comes from a Sixties smash by the Troggs, and it occurs to me (not for the first time) that there cannot be much time left for a revival. The title (I Can’t Control Myself) might attract negative comment in some quarters these days, but the resulting publicity would only help with promotion.
The vogue for low-slung comedy trousers has already lasted longer than anyone could have anticipated, and the window of opportunity must surely close soon.
Has no one in the world of popular music noticed this?
Where is Jonathan King when the world of pop needs him?
I can’t find Reg Presley on Twitter; if anyone knows where he is, please communicate the suggestion.
Let’s hope he remembers that the idea came from me and not from a UFO. He would be welcome to show his appreciation. Cash rarely offends.
Friday 17 September 2010
A bit like Dodgeball
Another thing they used to do at Southend on Sea High School for Boys (the teachers, that is) was throw things at you . Blackboard rubbers, bits of chalk, things like that. That’s probably illegal now as well. Political correctness gone mad.
Detention without trial
I’m not sure what prompted this thought, but: what happened to school detention?
Does anyone know when it disappeared?
I mean proper end-of-the-day detention, rather than what my children, who naturally went to school more recently than me, seem to think represented detention (ie something that went on during school hours or at lunchtime).
I imagine it is illegal now for a teacher to imprison children after school.
At Southend on Sea High School for Boys one might find oneself in detention individually or collectively. For the sake of the younger reader (if there is one) here’s the sort of way in which the collective variety unfolded…
Teacher: “Will the boy or boys responsible for (insert crime here) kindly stand up?”
No movement.
“All right, you’re all in detention after school until half past five or until…” (until confessions forthcoming etc)
The idea, naturally, was that peer pressure (in the form of 25 to 30 oafs who were not specifically guilty and who would be resenting the fact that they were being held because of the one or two oafs that were guilty on this occasion) would produce a result. The strange thing is that I can’t remember whether it did, typically.
Looking at it from the viewpoint of the teacher (which I have never been prompted to do until now) it seems a high-risk strategy, paying off only if it worked fairly rapidly and otherwise involving either an increasing escalation of the collective penalty or the abandonment of it with resulting loss of face.
Loss of face can be pretty disastrous to a teacher, as we were able to witness even in those days.
Back then no one talked about stress, but they did talk about nervous breakdowns, and I’m fairly certain we saw a couple of those rapidly developing. How I wish I could undo whatever part I played in that.
Does anyone know when it disappeared?
I mean proper end-of-the-day detention, rather than what my children, who naturally went to school more recently than me, seem to think represented detention (ie something that went on during school hours or at lunchtime).
I imagine it is illegal now for a teacher to imprison children after school.
At Southend on Sea High School for Boys one might find oneself in detention individually or collectively. For the sake of the younger reader (if there is one) here’s the sort of way in which the collective variety unfolded…
Teacher: “Will the boy or boys responsible for (insert crime here) kindly stand up?”
No movement.
“All right, you’re all in detention after school until half past five or until…” (until confessions forthcoming etc)
The idea, naturally, was that peer pressure (in the form of 25 to 30 oafs who were not specifically guilty and who would be resenting the fact that they were being held because of the one or two oafs that were guilty on this occasion) would produce a result. The strange thing is that I can’t remember whether it did, typically.
Looking at it from the viewpoint of the teacher (which I have never been prompted to do until now) it seems a high-risk strategy, paying off only if it worked fairly rapidly and otherwise involving either an increasing escalation of the collective penalty or the abandonment of it with resulting loss of face.
Loss of face can be pretty disastrous to a teacher, as we were able to witness even in those days.
Back then no one talked about stress, but they did talk about nervous breakdowns, and I’m fairly certain we saw a couple of those rapidly developing. How I wish I could undo whatever part I played in that.
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