Oil City before it was slick

Exclusive prequel to the film about Dr Feelgood, Oil City Confidential....

In early 1972 there was a Southend band called Cow Pie. We had a regular Sunday night spot at a seafront pub called the Esplanade, and one Sunday we gave it over to some acquaintances who had a newly-formed group called Dr Feelgood.

A refreshing change from what was regularly on offer and no mistake! Musically, at any rate. Image-wise, the trademark Dr Feelgood had yet to evolve.

At this point Wilko (ie John Wilkinson, with whom, a year or two previously, we had played for about a fortnight in one of our other exciting musical agglomerations) was still featuring his favourite kaftan-type shirt and pudding basin haircut (it was too warm onstage, obviously, for his Afghan coat). John Sparkes, if I remember rightly, was sporting the full Jason King look, with moustache complemented by curly mullet.

It was one of their very earliest engagements, and about a year before they started to get themselves noticed in London.

The drummer of Cow Pie was my old schoolmate Will Birch, later the driving force in the Kursall Flyers and The Records and now finishing off an Ian Dury biography which is to be published in 2010 by Macmillan. (Will_Birch on Twitter)

And just to show that the Cow Pie experience should not be too easily sneered at, another luminary-to-be, Ed Hollis, was kind enough to venture one Sunday night that he found our Friend Of The Devil more engaging than the Grateful Dead original...

I mention this because you might not readily make much of a connection between Eddie And The Hot Rods and the Grateful Dead. And if you believed such a connection might be unlikely you would be misguided. For instance, Graham Douglas (who was of course responsible for Eddie And The Hot Rods' big hit record) was a devotee of the Grateful Dead, the Allman Brothers, Quicksilver Messenger Service and all the rest.

How's about that then, as someone or other used to say?

Anglia: a piece of cake

Exclusive!!! This unique photographic document from the vaults shows the man who designed the 105E Anglia, using only spare Christmas cake and marzipan.

No computer nonsense in those days!

It was going to be Ford's first hatchback - before the cake ran out. A flash of inspiration turned it into a notchback, and a Sixties style icon was born.

Just one of the fascinating images from my forthcoming volume The 20th Century Remembered In Some Old Pictures I Have Just Found.

Look out for news of more....

Shiver me timbers

Bring on the nuclear power, that’s what I say. And be quick about it.

Conditions in our house in the last 24 hours have provided a chilling preview of what life will be like in a few years’ time when we have run out of affordable energy and the Russians have turned the gas off.

The coldest day (and night) so far of this year’s winter coincided with the failure of our central heating and hot water boiler. The temperature inside the house rapidly declined to a point at which leaving the fridge door open would probably have warmed things up.

As well as a sample of a rather unattractive possible future, it provided a touch of nostalgia as well.

Younger readers will not have experienced the days before central heating and double glazing, but in our house it brought back childhood memories of the days when you relied on plenty of eiderdowns and a hot water bottle to stop the shivering as you got into bed, and woke in the morning to find frost on the inside of the bedroom windows.

Bring on the nuclear power. Otherwise the only possible way we might make the energy last is for us all to be a bit more sensible and stop wasting so much of it, but there can’t be a snowball’s chance of that happening.

Do it right

It ain't what you do, it's the way that you do it, the saying goes. Nowhere is this better illustrated, perhaps, than in the case of Fergie's killer aide Jane Andrews, now apparently reincarcerated.

As we are all aware, the reason she became incarcerated in the first place was that she was responsible for the death of a chap who had let slip that he didn't want to marry her. This, it seems, resulted in his being beaten with a cricket bat and then stabbed.

The available evidence, then, seems to indicate that his decision that marriage was not a good idea was probably a sensible one. What wasn't as sensible was hanging around after the decision was announced. The decision, obviously, would have been better delivered as he left the scene of the announcement promptly - by fast car or motorcycle, say. Even more sensible would have been to deliver it by telephone or e-mail.

So perhaps the saying needs some modification: It is what you do, but remember that the way that you do it may have a significant impact on the outcome.

Murderesses live!

There is still such a thing as a murderess! I know that because I heard it last night on Radio 4.

The Duchess of York’s former aide Jane Andrews, who apparently took out a chap of her acquaintance because he didn’t want to marry her (beat him with a cricket bat and then stabbed him - you wouldn’t want to mess with Fergie’s lot, would you?) has absconded from the open prison where she was serving her life sentence.

It’s nice to know there are still murderesses, isn’t it? Kind of cosy. Straight out of Sherlock Holmes. In an age when actresses and manageresses long ago decided they would rather be actors and managers, we still have murderesses. According to the BBC, at any rate.

I wonder if it’s a class thing: ie female killers from the lower orders are murderers while those who move in more elevated circles classify as murderesses? I wonder, but I’m not interested enough to research it.

We're all mates now, are we?

More in the press about ‘Nick’ Griffin, with the news that he is going to be a Barking candidate in the forthcoming General Election.

In the context of all the distaste and outrage generated by Nick Griffin and his friends, the irritation I am about to express may seem a bit trivial, but here I go anyway. Why, courtesy of the media, is he known to us as Nick?

Presumably his given name wasn’t Nick, unless his mother - divining that he was always going to be a bit short of gravitas, or because of some directly diabolical suspicions - actually called him after Old Nick. Presumably his name is Nicholas, so why can’t the media call him that?

The most horrible manifestation of this uncalled-for familiarity was at the time of the ‘Fred’ West trial, when we had constantly to hear the person concerned (just about the most repulsive individual most of us could ever hope not to meet) referred to as Fred, as if he were our big chum.

Why the hell couldn’t they have referred to him as Frederick West?

Why does this upset me, when it obviously doesn’t bother anyone else in the whole of the UK media? I don’t know. I’ll try to calm down a bit now.

Curse of Jackson?

More Jacksons for my sensational 2012 summer bill! My good friend Marco Rossi points out that I have overlooked, for a start, Jackson C Frank and Mahalia Jackson. They should pull the punters and no mistake. (Availability permitting, and there may be one or two stumbling blocks there.)

My researches have also turned up Wanda Jackson, Queen Of Rock, of whom, shamefully, I had been unaware (http://www.wandajackson.com/). She at least may still be around, it seems. Many of my targets, it appears, are no longer with us. Could it be that the name Jackson predisposes its owners to an untimely end as well as prominence in popular culture? One for the academics, I think.

Heights of Jackson

It is generally accepted that Michael Jackson was the most phenomenal phenomenon in the history of pop, but has anyone considered that he had a flying start – just by trading under the name of Jackson?

The name Jackson may well be the most phenomenal in the history of popular culture. Statistical analysis reveals that just possessing the name Jackson would, in any other industry, represent unfair competition.

If you are in any doubt, consider the bill I hope to put together for a Michael Jackson Memorial Season at Weymouth Pavilion in summer 2012, as part of the Cultural Olympiad which will accompany the London Games.

I am confident that the lure of appearing at Weymouth Pavilion* in the summer of 2012 will enable the successful assembly of the glittering line-up listed below.

Please note: Just for fun, one or two names have been made up - and there’s a free pair of season tickets for the first 500 people to spot which they are!

Please note also: Should any of the artistes ultimately be unable to fulfill the engagement – for instance, in case of death having unfortunately intervened – the promoter reserves the right to substitute a tribute artist from a similar or closely-related genre.

*Should Weymouth Pavilion have been demolished in the interim, the show will relocate to the Wurzeldome, Yetminster. If the Wurzeldome is not complete by 2012, all holders of pre-booked tickets will receive, absolutely free, an extra souvenir ticket celebrating what would have gone on if it had gone on. Any cash refunds will be in Zimbabwean dollars; exchange rate to be determined by the promoter.


Here is the provisional schedule…

June 1 to July 29 (60 nights, matinees Sat and Sun):

The Michael Jackson Experience. Plus special guests Jim Davidson and Jethro

July 30:

Joe Jackson

July 31

Glenda Jackson

Aug 1:

Latoyah Jackson

Aug 2:

Latoyah Wilcox

Aug 3:

Jackson Browne

Aug 4:

H Jackson Brown Jnr in Believe it or not, it’s H Jackson Brown Jnr! Popular philosophical musings.

Aug 5:

Millie Jackson

Aug 6:

Jack Jackson

Aug 7:

Jackie Jackson

Aug 8:

Jumping Jack Jackson

Aug 9:

Screaming Jack Jackson

Aug 10:

Jacknus Jacknusson

Aug 11:

Jackson Pollock

Aug 12:

Pollock with Celeriac Mash and Weymouth Bay Samphire

Aug 13:

Randy Jackson

Aug 14:

Marlon Jackson

Aug 15:

Tito Jackson

Aug 16:

Marshall Tito

Aug 17:

Janet Jackson

Aug 18:

Python Lee Jackson

Aug 19:

Jackson Heights

Aug 20

Keisha Jackson

Aug 21:

Spear and Jackson. Secateurs-juggling comedy duo. Cutting edge! Plus special appearance by Burning Spear Jackson, hot-coals garden barbecue novelty act

Aug 22:

Let’s get started! With Jackson Stops

Aug 23:

Germaine Jackson and Gordon Jackson in I’ve Left My Trousers In The Upstairs Downstairs House by Brian Jackson-Rix.

Aug 24:

Blind-Boy Peg-Leg Jackson. Roots.

Aug 25:

Rambling Roger Jackson. Routes.

Aug 26

Leon Jackson

Aug 27

Leon Redbone

Aug 28

Jackson Rathbone

Aug 29

The Stonewall Jackson Experience. Musical tribute to the life of General Stonewall Jackson, the American Civil War hero whose landmark stance on gay issues inspired a liberation movement. 32 nights (matinees Saturday).

Season ends September 30 with Midnight Parade of a Thousand Jacksons on Weymouth esplanade. Join in! (No vehicles; motorised wheelchairs only permitted. Spectators: no umbrellas please, as these many diminish the visual experience of others in the crowd.)


Thought for the season:

Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all they have. H Jackson Brown Jnr


Season sponsored by the Jackson Hole Chamber of Commerce, Wyoming

Also, how is it that...

Although we are all familiar with the word interloper, I have never heard the activity referred to by way of a verb, eg: “Yes, he/she was interloping at the personal space re-assessment workshop the other day”. Some dictionaries suggest that there is such a verb, though. I looked it up. So it’s just my ignorance…

Paint...

If you're passing Artwave West (between Bridport and Lyme Regis, Dorset): lovely show on at the moment.

There aren't many places you can look at interesting pictures in a relaxed sort of way entirely free (might not be free, obviously, if you want to buy one, but my particular favourite was an Edward Kelly job for which I just don't have the money).

Check at http://www.artwavewest.com

How is it that...

How can people become disgruntled, when no one ever becomes gruntled in the first place?

I can't say I've ever heard of anyone being gruntled. And if they did find themselves gruntled, the word doesn't make it sound a particularly pleasant experience. Being burgled sounds more pleasant than being gruntled, frankly, and everyone knows that's not very pleasant.

And how is that things get reiterated without having ever been iterated?

If iteration had gone on, a certain flying legend would certainly have been at it, given Capt W E Johns's liking for variety in expostulation. "Cheer up, Algy, old boy," Biggles iterated...

I ask these things simply because - well, I'd be interested in the answer. If I (Dave1999) had the number of followers on Twitter that Stephen Fry has, someone would no doubt provide me with it. In fact, the answer might come from Stephen Fry himself.

But how to get it? I doubt whether following him on Twitter would prompt him to follow me in return, thus enabling me to send him a direct message. Anyone have his e-mail?

Thought for the day

Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold
The best lack all conviction, while the worst ….

I don’t know what made me think of that, specifically, but I was disappointed that I couldn’t remember the rest. Thanks to the www I was soon able to get it.

Not all that long ago it would have meant a trip to the reference library (unless one happened to have a volume or two of W B Yeats on one’s bookshelves) and I'm sure I wouldn’t have got round to it.

Whatever the merits and de-merits of instant communication, the ability to instantly look things up must be one of the most remarkable changes of the last decade or two.

So I had my thought for the day tracked down in about 30 seconds flat. Not that it’s a particularly cheerful one…

Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

But there you are.

Damien Hirst said no...

Anyone like to say yes?

More on the Portland Arts Centre project...

Katherine Bryan-Merret and Samantha Polley have now arranged a long lease on the Old Laundry at Fortuneswell for the arts centre which they are planning to open on Jan 1 next year.

As reported here before, they are organising an exhibition in December to help raise the money they need, and are appealing for other artists to get involved by entering their work. Artists will be asked to donate 40% of what they receive from sales. The show will go on from December 6 to 19.

Samantha said: “We’re hoping that dozens of artists from around here will support the event, but it would be nice if we could somehow get a really big name involved. Damien Hirst’s office said no, unfortunately, but you never know what might happen…"

So a big name would be rather nice, in terms of helping the girls raise funds to get the whole thing off to a good start. But where can he/she be found?

Anyone with any ideas, please contact Kat or Sam: portlandartscentre@hotmail.co.uk

Here's another one...

How about Interested in being disinterested?

Doesn't sound very enthusiastic, admittedly. All right: Fanatically interested in being disinterested... How's about that, then? as Jimmy Savile used to say. Perhaps he still does.

I think I've lost the thread here.

PS: Those for whom disinterest is a professional principle will know that being disinterested is not the same as being uninterested, but a surprising number of people don't.

I'm dispassionate about....

After my whinge about all the passion that is being proclaimed these days on web sites, adverts and CVs in relation to just about every in sight, I’ve actually just thought of a half-amusing use for the p-word.

If you are a legal firm, say, or a financial adviser, you could be Passionate about being dispassionate.

You can have that one for free. Just mention where you got it, because I have a passion for building up my following on Twitter, which at present is all but non-existent. How can that be? (Dave1999, if you’re asking.)

Arts centre for Portland

Exciting developments on Portland, which is to get its own arts centre.

Katherine Bryan-Merret and Samantha Polley have lined up an old factory building in Fortuneswell which started life as a Victorian steam laundry. They intend to provide studio space for around 35 artists, as well as gallery space for exhibitions, events and teaching sessions.

They aim to open on January 1, but before that they plan an exhibition at the building in December which is intended to raise money to help get the whole thing going. The plan is that artists will donate 40 per cent from sales they make at the show.

The more contributors the merrier - but a big name or two would be a help... Any ideas or influence, anyone?

Info: 07518 346310 or http://www.portlandartscentre.co.uk/

More here soon...

Watch this space

Very interesting project coming up on Portland. Actually there are several, potentially, but the others are a bit further down the line. Read more about this one right here in the next day or two. And in the press... I'm working on that now.

Talking about Portland: interesting to hear Dorset County Council's director for environment, Miles Butler, say the other day that he can't see the long-discussed Portland relief road ever going ahead. Environmental considerations would block it, he suggested (it were built, it would run alongside The Fleet).

Hard to see the Government ever being willing to find the money anyway.

However...

Petrol and sport aren't mutually exclusive. Motorcycle racing, that's a sport. So is lawnmower racing.

Carnival time

Motor car racing: a nation celebrates!
Fair enough. Just one question: why do they insist on calling it sport?

Passion fatigue

What condition prevailed amongst the British middle classes before they became passionate?

I ask because it was only fairly recently that passion seemed to break out, but now it’s all over the place. You can’t look at a website, CV or e-mail without being assaulted by sheer passion.

I thought I’d seen it deployed in some every possible context until, heading west from Plymouth recently, I found myself following a truck operated by a firm which declared itself “passionate about your laundry”.

Dictionaries define passion as a very powerful feeling, for example of sexual attraction, love, hate, anger or other emotion… an extreme interest in doing something, so it’s an irony that it has become just about the most humdrum word you can turn to.

One principle I have applied in recent years when sorting job applications is that the applicants who declare themselves passionate about the area of activity they are seeking to work in go to the bottom of the pile.

Come on people, it’s time to think of a less hackneyed way of expressing enthusiasm. Thesaurusising is not my function, but here are a few possible ideas for anyone who would like them: resourceful, dedicated, committed, enthusiastic…

Or try good old British understatement: “Quite keen about raising standards in the world of glue”.

I am proud to say that I operate in a passion-free zone. My friends would tell you that that’s no surprise. Actually I haven’t really got many friends. That’s what can happen if you don’t show some passion.

He knows

Excellent exposition of emarketing etc at Kingston Maurward 14.10.09 by David Lakins. He's the guru! Find him at www.keymultimedia.co.uk

Calm after the calm

Still nothing shaking, not even the leaves on the trees, at Weymouth Lack Of Speed Week. If I were involved, I think I'd be crying by now. (I know there aren't any trees on the Portland beach road, they're metaphorical in this instance.) Surely must be one of the most windless Autumn weeks on record...

Is it just me?

It has come to my attention (as the headmaster at Southend on Sea Grammar School for Boys used to say) that I am not the slightest bit interested in what Cheryl Cole does, says or looks like. Does that make me unique? One would hope not.

Blowing in the wind... (not)

It's an ill wind that blows nobody any good, they say (whoever they are) but the wind's pretty ill at the moment for everyone connected with Weymouth Speed Week this week in Portland Harbour.

The idea is to sail (or windsurf, or kitesurf) as fast as you possibly can, and it's quite hard to do that when there's virtually no wind, which was the situation prevailing today.

Current forecasts predict similar conditions for the whole rest of the week - a pretty dismal prospect for everyone involved. The lovely autumn sunshine won't be much consolation for them. The logic of holding the event at this time of year is the likellihood of autumn gales, but this is the second time in four years that the weather has failed to oblige.

Maybe not

Some constriction of the neck has resulted from looking at too many things sideways. If some worthwhile insights had resulted it might be worth it, but none so far. I think I might try just looking sideways in a metaphorical sense now - or I might if I knew how that would work.

Interesting time today at the Weymouth and Portland Sailing Academy and Portland Marina (Open4Business Marine Day organised by Roy Griffiths) - the main interest for me being how much things have moved on since I was last there about six months ago. Plenty of boats in berths already at the marina; nearly all of the shoreside commercial space taken; pub (The Boat That Rocks) up and running, and being operated by the marina firm, Dean and Reddyhoff, rather than an outside operator, which was the original plan (but they apparently pulled out).

Having walked around the immediate area as well, a number of thoughts are prompted, one of which is: what is going to happen about Castletown, nearby? If you know the area, you'll know what I mean. If you don't, the most charitable way to describe it would be run-down. But this whole part of Portland will from now on be playing host to thousands of well-heeled visitors. Do all those old pubs and hotels have the prospect of suddenly going upmarket, transformed by people who see the opportunity of catering for the yachties? Looking at them, it sems hard to believe right now, but logically the possibility must surely exist.

There are a couple of other interesting things coming up on Portland in the not too distant future...

Sideways

How to start? Sideways, maybe. When a new newspaper column is being introduced, it almost always seems to be announced as a sideways look at the world, life, or something.


So sideways seems to be best. I'll be taking a sideways look at things. If you see someone looking at you sideways, it could be me. No cause for alarm (unless it isn't me, in which case there might be).


Things I'll be taking a sideways look at today will include the news that Steve White is selling the Open 60 boat that he sailed in the recent Vendee Globe solo round-the-world race (one hopes that is because he is lining up a new one and not because he is finally so skint that he has no option) and the crazy world of Brad Wiggins (you can follow him on Twitter if you choose).


I'm intending to go into town to catch up with Claire Robertson and have a sideways look at Wellworths, to see if it looks any different from that angle. On Monday I might well be off to Portland, where I will be able to take a sideways look at the Marine Day being organised by my good friend Roy Griffiths ( http://tinyurl.com/ygfkxsw ). There are a lot of things I should be doing instead, but never mind...


I'll be reporting back, all being well, perhaps with a fresh perspective....